Mr Giant Spider

Hundreds and Thousands of Chickens

The weather in New Zealand is Bi Polar at best, but lately it has been particularly unpredictable, the only foreseeable difference being the sweltering, flesh curdling heat we've been forced to endure. Most kiwis seem to be bearing the heat quite well and getting on with their lives. 

All except me.

I have trouble sleeping in the best of conditions, now this fevered weather has reduced me to a sweaty, thrashing insomniac come night time. 

So I arrive at work after a three day, anxious, restless stint. My eyes must have looked like a zombie with a heroine problem. I trudge into the Delicatessin to find two of my co workers and my boss wearing the same weary expression.

While my third co worker stands in the corner and giggles at the rest (no change there).

I got straight to work. Serving my beautiful customers.

I usually take a little break from my lovely customers and giggling co worker to take out the rubbish. Today though, I walked outside to find the sky lit up a florescent light on crack. I was instantly blinded and smashed in the face by the closed fist of humidity. I staggered around for a minute before regaining the ability to see and I had stopped frothing at the mouth. Quickly dumping the rubbish in the skip, I joyously returned to the air conditioned deli. 

Only to find Vikki had gone home early.

She'd been out all night and thought it best to have a cup of coffee before work to keep her awake.

 Only she didn't have a cup of coffee. She had six.

Spending most of her day vibrating round the deli like an electric toothbrush, trying desperately not to throw up.

My boss sent her home.

And put me

On cooking

CHICKENS 

The sad thing about Vik being that tomorrow her brain is going to need caffeine again and she'll be right back on the beans. 

I digress. So I was put on chickens. Cooking hundreds and thousands of chickens in the heatwave of the century, the chickens themselves reaching temperatures of up to 100 degrees Celsius. While the pathetic fan above my head wurred away flimsily, my vital glasses of water grew warm, my hat stuck to my forehead by sweat alone and my uniform shirt slowly glued itself to my back.

So yeah.

Today

was quite

hot.